Monday, September 04, 2006

Idiot Season

It is that time of the year again. The guys come out to do their thing, and hopefully do it well. The Artist and I spend daddy/daughter time by going into the den, turning on the tube, and watching the guys do their thing. Then it happens:

Dropped pass...tackling at the shoulders...missed block...interception...missed block...offsides penalty...missed to convert on 3rd and 1...give up a first on 3rd and 17...missed tackle

Being the mild, sensible father that I am, I exhibit sound judgment by governing what starts in my vocal cords, works past my tongue and teeth, and comes out of my mouth. Of all the sundry words I could use, they all get translated into the same word: IDIOT!!! (Mrs. Quipper and Mom Of Quipper have a friendly bet about how many times I will use that word on "any given Sunday".)

The volume changes regularly. The more exasperated I get, the louder it gets. The more subtle the guffaw, the quieter the exclamation. I think the Artist learns more about the game when I get frustrated than when she actually asks about what is happening. It's pretty funny.

Anyway, hope springs eternal on Saturdays and Sundays. Here's to Romeo, hoping he can coach the Brownies to an over-.500 season and a potential trip to the playoffs. And to Tressell, hoping the Buckeyes can maintain their lofty ranking and work their way to a BCS championship.

Go Teams!


Des_Moines_Girl said...

Sounds like our house! Hubby can get pretty vocal when he starts "coaching" the tv.

Scottius Maximus said...

Not a comforting thought, to realize that the fates of entire seasons rest in the hands of a bunch of idiots.

Quipper said...

DMG - I coach the tv a lot for most any team sport - football, basketball, baseball. Mrs. Quipper only cares about baseball, though.

Scottius - just remember, though, they are MY idiots. :-)

Scottius Maximus said...


When Braylon Edwards deflected a perfect pass to whoever it was, I thought of you! He has to be the "Idiot of the Week".

Quipper said...


Idiot(s) of the Week honors:

Win - Maurice Carthon, for the worthless first half offensive game plan.

Place - Braylon Edwards, he of the sure hands, for catching the ball with his body INSTEAD OF his hands at the crucial point in the game.

Show - The announcers. They were awful. I never knew that this was Reggie Bush's first pro game.

Also, I don't think N.O.'s defense is that good, they played against Carthon's offense, after all.

Scottius Maximus said...


My local FOX station was carrying the Detroit/Seattle game, and after it was over the network went to the end of the Saints/Browns. Therefore I missed the first half offensive game plan.

Who are your regular announcers?